Easter Vigil Nerves

Saturday Night. Easter Vigil Night. The Night before Easter Sunday and my whole family is in bed (well except for me). We are all nervous or curiously awaiting Easter Day in our own ways.

I don’t know whether Jesus’ disciples were nervous or scared or anxious or curious after Jesus died by crucifixion. We know they didn’t anticipate his resurrection the next-day, as Christians now do in the telling and remembering the story of Jesus’ life death and resurrection a reminder that God our creator has not forgotten us, God is with Us, and God shows us through Jesus that the power of Love is stronger than death or evil. No, the disciples didn’t know this quite yet. They were likely fearing for their lives, wondering if they were next to be crucified as a follower of Jesus. They had celebrated the Passover meal (Lord’s supper) one last time with Jesus and now he was gone. They would need to come up with new traditions and rituals as followers of Christ, and yet it takes awhile to figure out what to do next. When Jesus appeared to them and before he ascended he reminded them of the instructions he gave them prior to his death, he reminded them he would send an advocate, a guide after he was gone, he reminded them of what to “do in remembrance of me”.

I left my ministry position on Dec 31st and our family decided to no longer attend the church I had worked at for just a few days short of 10 years. That took some serious strength and courage and humility for all of us. We then have been wandering through a season of grieving the loss of our participation in that worshiping community (knowing they still love us and welcome us should we choose to return). We lost the ritual and time marker of Sunday mornings that we’ve known for all of our daughter’s lives and liver for Doug and I. We gave ourselves a month of sleeping in on Sunday morning’s. Then Girl Scout cookie season landed and Katie sold cookies and before and after those three weekends, were days we were ill or otherwise committed. Suddenly, three months later (interesting to note Jesus’ resurrection came three days after his death) we are going back to church for the first time as a family on Easter Sunday.

While we’ve been pondering which churches to attend in our community this particular Sunday wasn’t difficult to decide. We’re attending the church Doug’s dad plays and has played trumpet for on Easter Sunday for many years. It is the first Easter without Doug’s mother accompanying his dad to worship. It is the first Easter since Janine’s death. Doug’s brother & family is in the area celebrating the Jewish holiday of Passover with his wife’s family and the word is we may get to see him as well.

This is the first Easter Sunday in 17 years that I have not been a part of leading children’s egg hunt or a youth Easter breakfast or giving a Children’s sermon (of which I think my favorite all time was last year’s!). It is weird not to be anxious and excited and prepping something up to or past midnight only to set my alarm to arrive at the church for more prep at 5am Easter morning. We’ll simply be participants in a worship service with a community where we know very few people and whose traditions we are unfamiliar. I kind of don’t know what to do with myself.

Also, this is the first year without the Eater Bunny visiting our home. Katie revealed to me recently she no longer believes in the Easter Bunny. Doug isn’t really “feeling” like doing any celebrations because similar to Christmas he can’t help but think about his mother not being around to celebrate. So in a sense it is good we don’t have to do an Eater bunny performance, however, I’m convinced we need something with so much of our past “normal” no longer being normal. So Katie and I played Easter bunny and purchased simple Easter candies for each family member and we’ll have breakfast together in the morning before going to worship. We’ve NEVER done this as a family of Four. I don’t think Doug and I even ever did that pre-kiddos – maybe one time before I was hired to my first professional ministry position.

As we keep vigil for the hope and promise of a new life – on earth as it is in Heaven – in the resurrection of Jesus we have unknowns, uncertainties, anxieties, and realities we are not necessarily wanting to face tomorrow. But we will do it and we’ll be OK. We have each other and God is with us.

What anxieties and unknowns and real sadness, hurt , or anger do you bring from Easter Vigil to the celebration of Easter Resurrection Day? What ever they may be – know that God is still with you always and has not left, forgotten or abandoned you.

A photo from my Facebook memories from March 30th,2013. Katie (now 10) set up my mother-in-law’s guide dog to be the Easter Bunny. So sweet. In memory of Janine Prindle. ❤️

Sandwiches & Privilege

Had an amazing conversation with my 8 yo in the car tonight. We were at a Subway restaurant where there were several frustrating dynamics occurring simultaneously. As we arrived at 8:15/8:20 we were told they only had two types of bread left, then 8:25ish as we sat down with our meal they asked a group of people at two tables next to us to please leave since they weren’t paying customers and only there for the wifi. They also asked those of us who were paying customers to eat quickly and wrap it because they were closing the restaurant due to bread shortage. At 8:35 some young men were still at the table studying and the employees again told them they needed to leave since they hadn’t purchased anything. One of the guys called the employee names using derogatory words and said he was staying until 9pm because that is what the sign says and their power was out and they needed to complete an assignment. The male employee threatened to call the cops and there was more interaction. Eventually the quiet guy offered to buy a drink and they refused to serve him because of the friend’s attitude. 

While that interaction was occurring there was a homeless woman also in the restaurant who spoke up loudly saying “Guys, Burger King is open for awhile so just go there” they argued about whether or not there was wifi and decided to stay and stand their ground until police showed up. 

There was a point the women got up and went over to the drink area and grabbed a bunch of sugars. The female employee started yelling from behind the counter “Lady, lady, you need to stop and get out of here”. Then some device she was carrying dropped and the batteries fell out near us, Katie helped pick up the pieces. Meanwhile I could hear the employee loudly commenting to other customers that she came in to buy a drink and then continues to sneak over for more and is just drinking and drinking the water. 

At 8:40, a customer who just got his food (and likely the last load of sandwich bread) sat down at the table next to us and as he was going to bite his sandwich the woman employee came over and said “Sir you need to leave now because we have no more bread and are closing the store.” The man looked up and asked “Seriously?” and she said “Yes, we are closing the store you need to leave” and she gave me a look as well. So he got up and left annoyed and I wrapped up our food and told Katie we needed to go. She asked “Why – didn’t they say the are open until 9p?”. She is loud in her questioning and kept asking Why mommy? And as we went out the door I said “You can ask them if they want, but they say we can’t stay because they are out of bread.” 

At 8:43 we were in our car and they had turned out their lights and the young study buddies were still there. Katie noticed and wondered if the police were going to come and she called the Subway employees evil meanies. 

From there on our drive home we talked about why the Subway employees were upset about the wifi non-paying customers and the homeless woman. She wondered why employees at restaurants haven’t asked her to stop when she took extra sugars for her lemonade and I said it was likely because they assumed your family had money to pay and a knowingly homeless person gets judged differently because there is assumption they don’t have the money to be paying customers. She asked why they couldn’t give wifi to someone whose power was knocked out by the weather. She asked why places can’t let homeless people stay in when it was cold – we talked about various perceptions in society and different reactions. We also talked about some models of businesses who do choose to help or offer assistance and how sometimes there are a few persons unfortunately abuse and take advantage of the offering that kind of ruins it for others.

Another part we talked about was how to be arm respectful customer if you are not being treated well. For instance I think the study buddies were rude, but the Subway employees didn’t exactly have the best behavior either. 

I love my daughter’s heart. I told her even though we don’t always have the extra money for things we do have a home, food, cars, jobs, school, and this makes us rich compared to others. This gives a privilege and it isn’t something we are always aware of. Of course there are privileges we don’t have but we have more privilege than others. I talked with my 8 yr old about the privilege she has and how we need to be aware how people see us compared to others and we need to be aware so that we can speak up for injustices or learn how to right wrongs and difficult privilege-based situations in society. She wants to be a change maker and I pray her heart won’t be jaded. 

Children’s Book Review: The Story of King Jesus by Ben Irwin

   “The Story of King Jesus” by Ben Irwin is a great new book brought to us by David C. Cook publishing! It is a refreshing perspective of the Bible in a nutshell that incorporates Creation, the calling of Israel, the ministry, death, and resurrection of Jesus, and why all of that is important for people today and in the future – God is renewing creation with his love (including humankind) and we are called to help further this mission to the time of completion that will occur when king Jesus returns. Ben Irwin, of course, doesn’t use as big of words to communicate his interpretation of Genesis through Revelation with young and elementary age children.

I read this to my own daughters (ages 7 and 10 years) and my seminarian theology-geek heart was filled with joy because it sums up what I’ve been learning about through my masters of divinity classes (canonical approach!) and the perspective of God that I’ve for so long attempted to communicate to children and their parents as a children’s minister.

Parents and children’s ministry (kidmin) leaders – Sometimes it is hard to teach children about Jesus’s death without instilling fear of death or scaring them with images of nails and blood and violence. Let’s be real – violence happens all throughout the Bible and is an important part of the story and the reason why God is wanting to reclaim and redeem the world. Bob Irwin does excellent work explaining certain situations – people fighting, Israelites being thrown into captivity because they didn’t follow God, wrong doings of many of Israel’s kings,seeming silence of God, Jesus arrested in the garden and death on the cross – in a way that says “This is/was not OK, it hurts and is sad, BUT THERE IS HOPE”. The illustrator of “The Story of King Jesus” – Nick Lee – also does beautiful and amazing work portraying these scenes in a powerful, meaningful and not-overbearing manner.

My 10 year old is an aspiring artist (loves to draw!) and she was highly impressed with the illustrations in this book. Her only dig was “why does everyone draw Adam and Eve as naked behind the bushes?”. Silly girl! My seven year old daughter was able to understand the story and even tell other parts that weren’t specifically mentioned, but she could look at the pictures and without reading the words and understand what is being depicted.

I highly recommend “The Story of King Jesus” to anyone looking for a good solid canonical theology of Genesis to Revelation children’s book and for folks looking for artwork to depict the Bible as well. I thought it would be thicker than it was but it is a thin 24 page book, which I then assumed would be simple and cute – yet it is packed with information and it is not too overwhelming unless you have a wiggly child – then you might break it up into parts reading over a few bedtime story sessions.

Check it out – Bob Irwin’s “The Story of King Jesus” today, comment on this post today and WIN A COPY of “The Story of King Jesus” by Bob Irwin!!

If you’d like a copy of this book, I have an opportunity to give away one free “The Story of King Jesus” book to one special random drawing winner.

How to Enter (now through Sunday, April 19th):

1. Leave your name and reason why you’d like a copy of this book in the comments below for one entry.
2. Share this post via Facebook, Twittter, Google+, and even pin to Pinterest and then leave a comment telling me where you’ve shared.

I’ll draw a name at 2 p.m. on Sunday, April 19th, 2015 – get your entries in and if you think of someone else who might love this book, be sure to share this post with them so they can enter as well.

In the meantime, if you’d like to purchase the book you can find it at:

ChristianBooks.com  | ThoughtfulChristian.com | Barnes and Noble | Amazon.com

or your local independent bookstore!

BTW – the only compensation I receive for this post is a copy of the book to use for review and promise of a giveaway book to my readers upon review.

Thanks for reading and don’t forget to comment to enter the drawing!!

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Bouncing Back into Blogging

I’m coming out of  a long dark blogging hiatus… My blog has been silent for a while. Somewhat unintentionally and somewhat intentionally.

A crazy hard tragedy struck my extended family in November last year in an incredibly exponentially emotional manner. I wanted to write about it, but I in the midst of my role as a caregiver, supporter, and mourner I didn’t know how. I could pour out my emotions, but I didn’t want to hurt anyone in my family any deeper. I could write about what had happened, but I didn’t have all the details and I didn’t know if I had permission.  I have posted little bits and pieces via Twitter and Facebook, but more as a plea for prayer rather than a place to process.

As time has passed, I have almost blogged: a few months ago I typed into my iPhone WordPress app which then didn’t post a thing and deleted everything I typed up. Ah, well I guess it wasn’t the right time. I decided I’d be okay with that.

Next, the Seattle Seahawks went to playoffs and the SuperBowl, which consumed a lot of family energy. My husband is one of those hardcore born-in-Seattle sports fan – and our daughters are following suit. I’m happy just to help clean the house and play hostess while others come hang out and have fun together watching a sport I’m still trying to figure out in the almost 20 years I’ve known my husband.

THEN, it was my season of craziness as a mom – chaired the committee to host two PTA Science Nights at my girls’ school, launched into a first year of selling Girl Scout cookies with each girl in a troop, (I really wanted to blog about these things, but alas no remaining time or energy!), and Softball season began for both girls. All this in the span of 2 weeks time. I pretty much was crazy. Did I mention my husband and I both work full-time jobs and already chauffer them to piano lessons and one to martial arts class and the other took up playing cello in her 4th grade orchestra (oh yeah, she played basketball in Fall/winter too)?? What. Was. I. Thinking?!? I clearly wasn’t.

Ah well, I guess it is good to get all these experiences out of the way early on so they can be well rounded and figure out what they want to do in life. They’ll need to figure it out now, so they will have the time to help their own children (should they be parents!) in the future. Sheesh!

Only took a little insomnia and a Pinterest inspired brownie recipe that is seriously yummy at 1:30 a.m. to get me going. You must try this Fake Betty Crocker Brownie Mix! It took longer to heat the oven than it took me to pull out the ingredients and mix up the batter. My next goal is to see if I can create a gluten free, vegan version that is potentially just as easy and delicious to make. Any suggestions??

In my next post I’ll talk about my family tragedy. Because it needs to be documented and I need the processing.

Teaching children about Peace at Advent – a real life experience

Our home Advent Wreath

 

So I came up with an original idea for a children’s sermon yesterday. So often I am   pressed for time and drained of creativity that I lean on the inspiration and wisdom of others for a 3-5 minute children’s sermon. I’ll share my fave resources later in this post. It was the second Sunday in advent and I live to educate the children (and congregation) about the happenings of the liturgical church year. The second candle in the advent wreath is often a symbol of peace – the first candle symbolizing hope.

I have a lot of “quirky” favorite hymns/songs for Advent and Christmas and one particularly beautiful song was running through my mind. I realized it would be PERFECT for talking about Peace. Looking at the words of “Before the Marvel of this Night” I read it as a poem describing God’s commissioning of his angels before they visited the shepherds and the world with their message of “Jesus is born! To God be the glory!”. Is also read it as a commissioning for believers to go and tell our world about the gift of peace that comes to all of us through Jesus. So I crafted a children’s talk where I asked the kiddos to imagine they were Angels on a mission and to hear God’s instructions to them before going to the world.
I was so excited, it was awesome and beautiful all at the same time.

Fast forward to real time and actual giving of children’s sermon – I start up and their are a few usual distractions – of other people’s children – just the littlest ones getting used to coming up for a talk, etc (which by the way – if the parents are reading this – does not bother me at all!!).

Then I read the poem.

As I am reading I look down at my feet and see my two daughters (one is 5 years old and one is 8 years old) fighting over a pencil. I finish reading and as I am commissioning the children and adults to go out into the world as agents of peace, I calmly reach down and pluck the pencil out of their hands, and keep talking. I’m puzzled because my 8 yr old is still very frustrated squealing in a whisper “mommy she won’t give it back” over and over. I can see there is something my 5 yr old is guarding with her life but I don’t know what it is. They keep playing keep-away while I continue to talk about being agents of peace. My girls clearly are not getting what wisdom their mother was attempting to impart to them (perhaps God feels this way often?). So to make sure they are listening I stress ways we can bring peace – including to our brothers and SISTERS and PARENTS. (Insert congregational giggle here) and they keep on fighting. I swear they were oblivious. So I wrap it up with a prayer and sending children off to class — and then, in the hallway, help my daughters make peace with one another over a satsuma orange one swiped from the other.

I’ll have to introduce them to the musical version of “Before the Marvel of this Night”, maybe they’ll finally understand peace??

Now I Lay Down to Sleep

…but not soon enough! Our kiddos get to bed SO late, in my mind, and it internally drives me crazy. And I think I need to just let go of it. Let go of worrying about and wishing I were better at getting them to bed “on time”. What even is an on time bed time for a child these days.

It was easy when they were babies and toddlers.  To sleep by 7:30 p.m., of course they woke up a time or two through the night and way too early in the a.m. for this night owl momma. also, I clung long and hard Weissbluth’s  “Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child”. Which worked at the time.

Working with children, teens, and their families through church ministry exposes you to all sorts of parenting scenarios – so in your mind you can pick and choose what you’ll use and avoid when it comes to your own children. Unfortunately, it’s not a simply “copy and paste” method of parenting.

I remember hearing how late some children went to bed on school nights and woke up in the mornings and seeing them exhausted through the day. MY children were not going to be those children they were going to get sleep. Except, more and more, they are. Now that Ellie is in elementary school with homework that must be completed, and we have them in occasional classes for swimming and weekly piano lessons. Doug and I both work full-time and mine work is ‘flexibly’ packed in between school hours, homework, and bed times. Plus the normal household duties and interactions … How do those become the “plus…” items in our week?

I discovered in college that I was so stinking exhausted because I never learned healthy sleep habits as a child. My single parent mother did what she could and yet we went to bed late and woke up early and I probably rarely slept through the night. I think I’m paranoid of this for my kids, but maybe if I let go and trust that we are doing our best with them and ourselves it will all work out in the end. I think I have to trust that it will and not kill myself with the unneeded stress.

 

“Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns.” (Philippians 4:6 Message Bible)